Sunday, December 4, 2011
Love and Relationships
LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS
What
is love?
Everyone
is constantly looking for their soul mate. When asked what their soul mate
looks like. They insistently refer to the classic tale of Prince Charming. The
modern day man who will sweep them off their feet and into a perfect world of
high finance, monogamy, exceptional love making. They say he has to be
romantic, and he must support my perfect career (if I want it) and of
course--children.
When
I ask the dreamer how she or he expects to find the perfect mate when they’re not
perfect themselves—they rebel. And when I suggest they become what they’re looking
for because it’s the only way to find it—they rebel. Daydreams are always
perfect because daydreams are the one thing we can control. Real life is very
different. It takes two perfect people to make a perfect relationship work--and
no one is perfect.
There’s
a lot of information out there in reference to love and relationships. Some of
it comes from the experience of the advice giver. And some of it comes from the
psychological projection of an academic that believes similar symptoms refer to
the same problem; and therefore have the same cure.
I
say, every bad idea begins with a lie, especially when you’re lying to yourself
about who you are. So when you find an attraction; take the time to get to know
the person you may want to spend a lifetime with before giving up your heart
and soul. It is only a true perception of a person that will help you to know
if this is the one that will lead you to your dream. And remember, good looking
can become ugly real fast when the beauty of the physical, has no actual
substance inside.
When
you invite someone into your life—you invite all that comes with them; every
aspect of their character, as well as their family and friends. Get to know
what that is before making an honest commitment of any kind. A lot of times we
end up loving but not liking our attraction. It is up to you to know which is
the most important, (love or like) because you are the decisions you make.
Our
companion should always be our best friend. If it’s about sex, money and
romance only—it’s not love. True love is about truth, freedom and sharing lives
with dignity and respect. It takes time, work and patience for both parties to
reach that point.
It
is important to remember that good sex isn’t love—it’s physical gratification
only. Good relationships are based on love, peace, respect, communication and
compromise. If it’s not what your relationship represents—you can accept it as it
is—or let it go. Again, we are the decisions we make!
I
often hear people say they can change their mate. It isn’t true, because you can’t
change another person’s nature, just as they can’t change yours. In order to
change our nature we must overcome our weaknesses. We must see them, correct
them and grow up. Your soul mate is someone who mirrors your soul--not your dream
come true.
In
all honesty and without ego or fantasy ask yourself the question, “WHAT DOES MY
SOUL LOOK LIKE?” If you can do that and see yourself in all honesty, flaws and
all--you’ll know what your soul mate looks like.
LET’S
TALK ABOUT IT!
Saturday, October 1, 2011
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